Tag Archives: zombie

The Adoption Talk I Wasn’t Prepared to Have

I recently was working in the yard when my 4 year old son came to my side and declared, “My real dad was awesome.”  This of course perked my ears up.  “real dad?”  “Yeah, my real dad, you know the one before you were my dad?”  I said, “son, what are you talking about?”  He chirped up, “you know, my dad before I was adopted.”

My son then proceeded to edify his case and tell me in great detail about his life “before” he lived with me and how great his “real” mom and dad was.

As an adoptive father, I knew this conversation was coming.  My wife and I have been preparing for it ever since that fateful day we first held our two beautiful adopted boys in our arms.  As matter of fact, we have never hid our boys adoption and have always tried to talk to our boys openly about it.  Maybe that was the problem.  You see, Our adopted boys are now 9 and 7 years old.  Their four year old brother standing before me now is actually my own flesh in blood.  Looks so much like me that he once looked at an old picture of me with Santa Claus and declared that it was him.  Honestly… it vary well could have been him as he is my little clone.

I must admit, it hurt more than I expected.  I was initially stung by the words when he declared that I was not his “real dad.”  He said it so matter of factually and with a gleefulness and excitement.  How could this little man be so happy and proud to pronounce that I’m not his “real dad,”  And where in the world did he hear this anyway?

Of course I know where.  He adores his older brothers and wants to be like them in so many ways.

I have always expected and been prepared to “defend” my rightful place as “dad” with my older boys.   I stand confident in my roll as “heavy object mover”, “rasslin king” , and “professional hook baiter.”  I even occasionally turn into the terrible “Zombie Dad” from time to time that is always good for squeals of delight.  I constantly work extra hard to be at my kids school events and even volunteered to lead their Cub scouts group, and when they have an injury, I am there to wash it, tell them to suck it up and walk it off.  

I am DAD.

come to think of it…. It doesn’t really matter which of my kids want to challenge my status.  What makes me their father is the same.

I love my children.  I will always be there for them.  They can never do anything that would prevent that.

I am their DAD.

so if my biological son wants to fantasize about being adopted.  Who cares.  I know where he will always end up when he has a scrapped knee.

Probably running to his mother….

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Zombies!!!

Zombies are real.

We create them everyday in hospitals and medical facilities all across this country.  Not in sinister basement labs or secret government facilities.

But they are real.  Dead humans, brought back to life to be brainless, rotting, eating machines.

For as much horror as Zombies invoke, I am amazed at how easily people often allow this Zombification to be performed on their own loved ones.

Now let me be clear.  Doctors, nurses, and other healthcare providers try to warn people and often work hard to avoid the zombification procedure from being done but it is often futile as families ignore this professional advise and will even insist that the procedure be done at all cost.  In some cases, when families and patients are not satisfied with the first zombie procedure, they will insist that it be repeated over and over again.  With each procedure the chance of full fledged zombiehood  increases to the point that it is an almost certainty.

Certainty that the patient will be left a brainless existence and lay rotting, moaning, and wallowing in their own filth with nothing more to do than feed.

At this point in the post I am certain I have lost a few readers (either in disgust or in contempt for my ridiculous notion) but hear me out.

The way Americans approach end of life care is atrocious.  Our society is immature and uneducated about one of the most basic truths of life.  The truth that we all die.  Also the truth that we are meant to die and pass this world on to our children and grandchildren (hopefully better than when we got here but that’s debatable and a whole different post.)  Modern medicine has given us remarkable tools to improve and sustain life but often these tools are used excessively with little real benefit to quality of human life and existence.

Dr Ken Murray recently posted an excellent blog, Zócalo Public Square :: How Doctors Die. In which he explains that doctors themselves rarely use the full extent of modern medical capabilities toward end of life.  Why is this?  Doctors have spent a life time in the study of life and with this, they are comfortable with death.  Not only are physicians comfortable with death, we know that people can (and often do) die BADLY.  Doctors want to have “The Good Death.”

When they see that time of death approaching and if given the opportunity, they will usually welcome the good death and refuse aggressive medical care.  Medical care that will only lead to complications, pain, and suffering in the last days.

So if this is what most doctors want for themselves and recommend for their families, then why not for their patients?  I can go into a long soapbox of how lawyers, politicians, doctors, patients, etc. etc. have all poisoned the system and the doctor patient relationship, but I wont.  The answer is in each and every one of us.  The whole U.S.A society.  We all share the blame that we have glorified life and demonized death to the point that accepting death under any circumstance is a sin.

And what do we have to show for it?

GGggrrUgghhh….. Brains!!!